It's no secret that my Mum is very proud of her Chinese traditions and since I grew up celebrating them, it was only natural that I get married in much the same way. However, I'm also Irish and Craig's mother was Dutch, so I really wanted to touch base with these cultures as well. And let's not forget our Aussie traditions also! So here's a little overview of the traditions we celebrated.
Hair Combing/Dressing Ceremony
This ceremony is usually done at the family home so for this tradition, I travelled back to to Cairns. This is normally done the night before the wedding. The bride or groom need to bathe and dress in brand new underwear and pyjamas. They're supposed to sit by a window and gaze out onto the moon but it was too much of a party at my house and they forgot to tell me to do this! Chinese families who worship their ancestors or practice Taoism will also burn some incense on the family altar and serve lotus, dates and sweet dumplings in bowls. Fruits, roast pork & chicken are also prepared. Furthermore, both the groom and bride have to prepare ruler, mirror and scissors for the ceremony symbolising good generation.
Their hair needs to be combed four times and each has a special meaning.
1. The first combing symbolises: from beginning till the end.
2. The second combing symbolises: harmony from now till old age.
3. The third combing symbolises: sons and grandsons all over the place.
4. The fourth combing summaries: good wealth and a long-lasting marriage.
The whole action also symbolises the adulthood of the couple and wishing them a happy marriage.
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| My Mum, me and my brand new Monkey Pyjamas |
The Chinese Bridal Bed: Setting up the Bridal Bed (An Chuang) Ritual
Traditionally, a few days before the wedding, the bride's family send dowry to the groom's family, or the couple's new home nowadays. After the groom's family has selected a 'good day' as the wedding day, a man who's considered to have good fortune all through his life will be hired to move the bridal bed to the right place. Then a lady who's considered to have good fortune (with healthy and living husband and sons) will make the bed and place certain good fortune food and fruits on the bed. Then the bed will be left untouched until the day of the wedding. In some part of China in the old days, a unmarried young boy will be invited to sleep in the bridal bed the night before the wedding to bring fertility to the newlyweds.
Since Craig and I already had a bed, my Mum and Hayley brought new bed sheets and made the bed for us. My sisters also helped to decorate our bedroom walls & door with the auspicious Chinese character 'Double Happiness'. My Aunt also hand-made this special patchwork cover below! Talk about amazing.
After the bed was made, my Mum summoned the kids. Their job were to be omens of fertility–; so the more, the merrier. For the same reason, the bed was scattered with red dates, oranges, lotus seeds, peanuts, pomegranates and other fruits. My Mum used lollies! After watching Aidan, Chelsea & Mitchell fight over the lollies, they were then encouraged to jump on the bed. Yep, it must be hard being a kid, hehe.
Chinese Wedding Door Game
When the groom comes to collect his bride from her house, he will inevitably be blocked at her door by her sisters, friends and the bridesmaids will play door game with the groom and his attendants. The door game implies that the bride’s family and friends do not want to marry her away so easily and will not ‘surrender’ the bride until they were satisfied that he has passed their tests and are given Lei See, or red packets of money, from the groom. Basically, it's a great excuse to have a lot of fun (sometimes at the Groom's expense!).
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| This is me, locked inside my family house during the games. |
Irish Céilí (group dance)
No decent Irish family, could possibly have a wedding without a Céilí. This is a great social activity that may or may not require coordination, depending on how much alcohol you've had. During our wedding celebrations, we put on some great Irish tunes and organised ourselves into two lines. If you've never organised a Céilí before, it's best if you have someone who calls out the instructions so everyone else gets reminded as to what the next step is. But basically, it's a lot of fun and swing-dancing. And everyone gets a chance to pretend to be Michael Flatley!
Dutch Well-Wishing Tree
Craig's family don't really practise traditions the way my Mum does, but I really wanted to get in touch with his Dutch heritage so I did some research. I found out that traditionally, the bride and groom were normally given a seedling to plant, representing their future happiness. I adapted this idea a little by turning it into a guest book. I brought these fake silver branches and put them in a glass vase, with some glass pebbles for decoration. My mum made these beautiful blank cards for the guests to write their messages and well-wishes in. Each of these cards had a ribbon that they could then hang off the tree. So what started as bare branches were soon 'flowering' into a leaves of well-wishes. Here's the end result of our 'well-wishing tree'. My mum made an album for the cards, which we've now collected and compiled, along with our favourite photos.
Something Borrowed, Something New
